It’s called the Magpie Effect – the inexplicable power held over us by something that’s bright and shiny. No matter how mature, understated or sensible you think your tastes are, the sight of someone in iridescent kicks does something peculiar to the brain. Like a pirate to buried treasure, or a moth to a flame – you might not want them, you might not need them, you might not even really like them. But goddamit, you have to have them.
Ahead of tomorrow’s much anticipated Nike Blazer Mid QS Iridescent release, we’ve compiled a list of 10 of the very shiniest in shiny shoes to make you weak at the knees (and occasionally the mind). Feast your eyes on these.
1. Nike “Silver Speed” Air Trainer 1 Mid
Launched back in January as part of Nike‘s commemorative Super Bowl XLVIII pack, these outrageously shiny kicks created almost as much hype as the game itself. We’re submitting a formal request for the trophy to come in this colour next season.
2. adidas Originals Jeremy Scott Wings “Iridescent Foil”
With a designer like Jeremy Scott it would almost be weirder not to have the shoes clad in an eyebleeding array of reflective foil. Almost.
3. ACNE Black Oil Patent Derby Shoes
Released before Christmas last year (presumably just in time for office party season), these patent Derby shoes from ACNE prove that smart attire really need only be as sensible as the wearer.
4. Raf Simons Holographic Space Sneaker
No, we haven’t made that title up. The Belgian wunderkind has made a few iridescent sneakers in his time, but these are by far our favourites. Just ignore the fact they were apparently named by an eight-year-old.
5. Jimmy Choo Iridescent Crocskin Pumps
We like to imagine that, somewhere in the world, there are real life crocodiles swimming around with skin like this. And that Jimmy hunts them himself dressed in an iridescent safari suit.
6. Nike Hyperflight Max Iridescent
The Nike Hyperflight Max was already a pretty ridiculous shoe. But add a full-sprectrum rainbow iridescent upper, and it doesn’t just jump the shark, it blasts over it on a jetpack made of lasers and unicorns. If that’s not a reason to want a pair, we don’t know what is.
7. Dr Martens Oil Slick Lex
Safe AND stylish. Now you can look like you just stepped off the most fashion-forward oil rig in the ocean. Just don’t smoke too close to them.
8. Pierre Hardy 101 Iridescent High Tops
These shoes are about the closest you can get to wearing a disco ball on your feet, short of actually stamping through a disco ball (or having girl’s feet). We really wouldn’t recommend that.
9. Nike Air Force 1 Low CMFT
As if replacing half the upper with shimmering iridescent foil wasn’t enough of a statement for this stone-cold classic of the sneaker game, Nike went and added a BLACK FUZZY SWOOSH as well. Too much? We couldn’t possibly comment.
10. Lanvin Iridescent Runner
Both Will Smith and Robin Thicke have been snapped in Lanvin’s iridescent mid tops. That alone should make you never want to own a pair. Instead, go for something way bolder that neither of them could pull off in a million years, like these Runners. Checkmate, guys.