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If you’re in the market for a ride that’s capable of taking down a small army, look no further than the Shaman All-Terrain Vehicle.

Created in Russia, this SUV-cum-weapon-of-mass-destruction is powered by a 146 horsepower, 3.0-liter turbo diesel engine and is capable of reaching a top speed just shy of 50mph. Mounted on eight wheels, the behemoth comes with three drive settings: road (front 4WD), offroad (all-wheel drive in front and diagonal directions) and — moving into Transformers territory — crab mode (allows the vehicle to move side to side).

If the Shaman is impressive on the outside, inside it resembles a small aircraft; a single-seat cockpit allowing the driver to navigate his path of ruination, distraction-free. In the back, eight soldiers —sorry, passengers — can be accommodated on seats that also fold into beds.

Thankfully, for humanities sake, the Shaman is hard to come by. Each order is built to spec at a Russian manufacturing factory for around $125,000. Good luck getting a permit for it, though.

In other car news, this Mercedes G-Class knock-off looks positively tame in comparison.

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