So, Mark Zuckerberg has abs. Who knew?
The Facebook CEO took to Instagram on July 12 to share an image of him alongside two of his MMA training partners, where he revealed the exact biological make-up of his deceptively toned torso.
Zuckerberg, in knee-length shorts and hands wrapped, is undeniably flexing, both literally and figuratively. Ever since the robo-eyed, rubber-headed overlord began his glow up from classic nerd into an ass-kicking mat warrior, he’s shared every stage of the process through his IG.
This new fit pic, though, is Zuck fully peacocking. So let's unpack it, shall we?
Zuckerberg is in great shape owing to a fondness for mixed martial arts. He's also very pale. And while the latter was fully expected (because robots don't tan), the former most certainly wasn't. He has chest hair too, which is actually also pretty surprising.
Zuckerberg, with the help of training partners (and real life MMA fighters) Israel Adesanya and Alexander Volkanovski, is slowly morphing into an all-dominating meta combatant, presumably for when he guides mankind into the metaverse and leaves reality behind.
Either that or he’s readying himself for the highly-anticipated main card bout with Elon Musk, which we hope is still in the works after the Tesla emperor suggested the “Vegas Octagon” as a location for the fight soon after offering each other out via Twitter.
Whether that happens or not (it probably won’t) is one thing, although I can safely say, without speaking for the entire world, that we most certainly all want it to happen more than anything ever.
Either way, Mr. Zuckerbot’s abs really are something. In fact, the entire image is making me feel a little uncomfortable. Not because each subject is topless, I encourage that, but because Zuckerberg is now almost incomparable to the nerdy little Facebook gremlin we all came to know and loathe.
Still, if you use the internet to learn one thing and one thing only today, make sure it’s that you realize Mark Zuckerberg is in better shape than all of us, and there's nothing we can do about it.
