This past weekend, at the invitation of Pope Leo XIV, the Vatican hosted a lineup of some of the world's most esteemed filmmakers for a forum on the power of cinema in the secular world. Six-ish months into his tenure, the first pope to ever have opinions about deep-dish pizza is still full of surprises. The likes of Judd Apatow, Cate Blanchett, and Greta Gerwig attended the event, which was arranged with the help of Da God Marty Scorsese himself (Catholic royalty!).

This was not a Fashion Week photo opp: nearly everyone showed up in their Sunday’s best. Appropriate given, you know, that they were meeting the Pope at the Vatican. However, Caught Stealing director Darren Aronofsky either didn’t get the memo or chose to ignore it. 

Real ones know that there are few if any situations in which one can’t get off a fit. Sure, you probably shouldn’t stunt at a funeral or a trial — unless you're Gwyneth Paltrow or Luigi Mangione — but in most any other case, it’s not a matter of whether or not it’s appropriate to get a fit off so much as the sort of fit that the occasion calls for. This is to say that meeting, oh, I don’t know, one of the world’s most famous and powerful religious leaders might not be the right moment to bust out archival COMME des GARÇONS, but it certainly doesn’t mean you can’t dress to impress.

As such, I’d posit that meeting the head of one of the largest religious institutions on the planet might not be the moment to lace up your favorite sneakers, even if said religious head is a White Sox fan. 

Aronofsky clearly does not share my opinion, pulling up to the Vatican in a fit that had him, as one Twitter user said, “looking like he stopped by after brunch in Greenpoint.” It’s not that Aronofsky looks bad in his navy chore coat, necessarily, but his slightly snug white tee and mustard-yellow runners stood out in a sea of sensible suits, coats, and formalwear like a nun at Berghain.

Again, bro pulled up to the function in screamingly loud sneakers —New Balances, from what we can tell — while even Spike Lee, probably the only dude on the planet who could justify wearing sneaks to Pope country, opted for black leather derbies. It’s just an incredible sentence: The guy who directed Black Swan wore sneakers to meet the Pope — who, I cannot stress enough, is from Chicago.

Is it a fashion faux-pas? I can hardly tell. It’s not like he was turned away at the door, but it still feels like a sin. Mostly because, if you're gonna wear sneakers to meet the Chicago Pope, shouldn't they be "Chicago" Jordans?

In the interest of fairness, Aronofsky wasn’t the only director to pull up in kicks. Serbian filmmaker Emir Kusturica wore not only beat-up sneakers but beat-up jeans to go with them, though his look skewed so much on the don’t-give-a-fuck side that it actually kind of worked. I cannot overstate how much consistency plays into a fit coming together — part of what makes Kusturica's fit passable was that it was, as real heads know, consistent with his whole vibe as a filmmaker.

Actually, that could also be sid Aronofsky, really. The effort is palpable and yet, to what end? It feels like energy misplaced; Caught Stealing had all these great trappings but what if an equal amount of effort had gone into tightening up the script?

Personally I’ve never felt compelled to dress my best for someone who holds Soldier Field dear to heart, but then again I don’t think I ever assumed the head of the Catholic Church would have attended the 2005 World Series or written about the Villanova Knicks for a religious publication. There are exceptions to every rule, I guess. When the Pope hosts a summit for menswear writers I might have to take page from Aronofsky's book — keep an eye out for me in the Jacquemus Moon Shoes.

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