'Fit Battle: A Tale of Two Gagas
Lady Gaga pulled off the ultimate celebrity heist: hitting two red carpets in the same night.
The Chromatica pop star and House of Gucci flop-star attended the BAFTAs in London in a classically Gaga silhouette: a draped gown paired with gravity-defying platform heels, courtesy of Pleaser.
The towering shoe-boots didn't really match her emerald green frock by Ralph Lauren, but they did make quite the pair with Gaga's sassy little feathered clutch. Finished off with Tiffany & Co. jewelry, the look was Liz Taylor on top, plantar fasciitis on bottom.
Hours after appearing at BAFTAs, Gaga hit the Critics Choice Awards, broadcast from both London and Los Angeles.
As evidenced by The Fame Monster, Gaga does not succumb to Sophomore Slump. Outdoing herself, Ms. Stefani Germanotta had onlookers gooped, gagged, and gobsmacked in a boob dress to end all boob dresses (even Zoë Kravitz's!).
Designed by Gucci, the gown gave fans a lot to unpack. There were lace sleeves that doubled as fingerless gloves; rhinestones emanating out of Gaga's bellybutton; a vast train trimmed in black sequins.
But above all, there were Lady Gaga's boobs, gently caressed by two free-standing, entirely separate cups. It wasn't a bustier — nay, it wasn't even a bra! It was just... two cups.
To paraphrase the esteemed artist: There can be 100 boob dresses in a room, and 99 don't hit, but Lady Gaga's does. Always.
