It feels like there’s been no break in football over the past 18 months — and we love it. With the new season kicking off across the top leagues in Europe (and the rest of the world), Highsnobiety’s spicy hot editor’s roundtable is back.
As we have done over the past few years, our team of football-slash-fashion-mad aficionados have put a carefully curated selection of football kits under the microscope. We’ve made sure to include everything from top teams such as Paris Saint-Germain and Manchester United to more middling clubs, such as Arsenal (lolz), Parma, and SC Freiburg.
For hot takes, not-so-serious thoughts on football fashion, and a couple of geographical faux pas, scroll on to read through what kits we’re fucking with, and which we’re not.
Man United Away
Matt Carter: I'm a Wolves fan till I die, but I actually had this kit when I was a kid.
Fabian Gorsler (Footwear Editor): As a United fan, I’m happy adidas has finally gave us some good kits out this year. All three are banging. The only thing is... is the sponsor better than Chevrolet?
Graeme: Can we clear up for the readership, and myself, just what TeamViewer actually is?
Fabian: I don't want to say it’s a shittier version of Zoom, so I’ll take the diplomatic route and call it another version of Zoom.
Fabian: The Fortnite-ification of football shirt design continues.
Graeme: It is literally made bespoke for use in FIFA Ultimate Team.
Robbie Russell (Branded Partnerships): It looks like a stock iPhone background. It’s like that story about Future’s mixtape artwork, how he basically just has this art director that picks images from Getty. This is the same.
Robbie: This kit is absolutely horrendous and looks like shoes for kids. I wouldn’t be surprised if the kit and sponsor light up every time the players score.
Kev Soar (Branded Content Editor): The squares are kind of mesmerizing. I feel like if we stare at them long enough, a good kit might appear.
Arsenal Third Kit
Graeme: Arsenal doesn't deserve these good kits. That's nine out of nine that have been good.
Fabian: You’ve got to give props where they’re due. adidas and Arsenal have achieved what Nike has been trying to do — the perfect balance between streetwear and performance.
Newcastle United, Rangers & Wolves
Graeme: The Newcastle one looks like a four and when you see it, you can't unsee it. As a Rangers fan, I'm not having that gold either... because it isn't gold!
Kev: I know Castore has positioned itself as a luxury, independent sportswear brand but, their football operation seems at odds with everything else they're putting out.
Venezia Home & Away
Kev: I don’t think anyone would disagree if I said this was one of the best Kappa kits of all time.
Graeme: Kappa always do amazing shirts, they're the don at the whole retro-meets-modern fine. Look at the gold compared to the Rangers gold I was talking about earlier.
Matt: It's actually gold.
Inter Milan Home
Graeme: If you're going to spend millions on a rebrand, then do it properly. Without the logos, this could pass as an ALYX piece, plus Matthew Williams is an Inter fan.
Fabian: I would wear this one in a heartbeat, don’t get me wrong, but it’s just not an on-pitch kit for me. Same as Spurs.
Robbie: No, I’m not having that. The stripes remind me of rugby.
Fabian: It’s one of the better-hooped jerseys around, though. The sponsor actually works with the hoops. A lot of times the sponsor gets in the way.
Graeme: There are no good hooped jerseys.
Graeme: I don’t even care about the top — it’s okay — but Barcelona has the best shorts.
Matt: What I’m wondering is why Nike is obsessed with making these weird patterns that don't follow through? It's same with the Chelsea kit.
Kev: The Barcelona pattern matches the badge at least. There's a story. Whereas Tottenham's is just the galaxy and Chelsea’s...well..who knows.
Fabian: I really like this one.
Robbie: Come on, mate. This looks like it's from the Cat in the fucking Hat. It's a Dr. Zeus shirt.
Matt: Robbie’s right, it’s Cat in the Hat meets Where's Wally.
Graeme: You’re going to be looking like a big candy cane, lad.
Bayern München Third Kit
George Hammond (Branded Partnerships): The fact that I’m English, and I am drooling all over this kit speaks volumes as to how beautiful it is. I just wish they made this as a jacket, so I could take it skiing.
Fabian: It’s honestly one of the best Bundesliga kits this year. Shall we all get XXLs and organize a Highsnobiety ski trip?
SC Freiburg Home
Graeme: Without even know what this is, it’s the most German sponsor ever.
Fabian: It’s the local milk producer, which is a big flex because Freiburg, my hometown, has by far the best cows and milk in Germany. Don’t @ me.
Matt: Forget about the milk, let’s focus on those terrible, terrible stripes. Are they called Tigers?
Fabian: No, I have no excuses for how terrible the kit is. It’s just bad.
Hertha Berlin Home
Graeme: Hertha left their old sponsor because they wanted to get Amazon or Tesla or a brand of that ilk, being the capital city of Germany and all.
Robbie: And they ended up with... Auto Euro. Classic Berlin. Let’s not even talk about how bad the stripes are. What’s with kits and terrible patterns this year?
Borussia Dortmund Home
Robbie: I feel like this has been literally sewn together, and you can take the sleeves off, and then you can unclip it at the shoulders. It’s the football kit version of those two-in-one pants that are somehow back on trend but definitely not cool.
Fabian: This is the epitome of Bundesliga fashion. Most of the big leagues are moving towards a more fashion-forward world and then Bundesliga is like "no thank you, we’re good.
Graeme: Is it a football or lifestyle shirt? I was in the Nike store in Hamburg last week and this was the only kit on display. No Barcelona, Liverpool, Chelsea, Inter etc. Just this.
Robbie: What's the Italian club that's also iconic and has the same color scheme? Palermo? They've literally ripped off one of the sexiest teams of all time with this kit.
Matt: That's just PSG though. Nothing's original at PSG.
Dynamo Kyiv Home & Away
Graeme: Best kit on the list. New Balance always kill it.
Fabian: It's very ’00s. It's like a pattern you would find on a public transport seat or something like that.
Robbie: I think even Gazprom would work on that, wouldn't it?
Graeme: Too political.
Atletico Mineiro 113th Anniversary Kit
Graeme: That's just a fucking map on a T-shirt.
Matt: I wonder how accurate the map is. What's the connection between this club and the map of whatever that is?
Robbie: It's Brazil. The club is from Brazil.
Kev: [laughs] Don’t put that in the final article. I swear I know geography. The color is decent though.
Want to keep browsing? Head to the Highsnobiety Shop for more products that we love. Highsnobiety has affiliate marketing partnerships, which means we may receive a commission from your purchase.