How would a dog wear pants? At what depth does pizza become "deep-dish?" Am I so out of touch? These are the burning questions that keep us up at night but none is more prescient than age-old query: does wearing sunglasses inside make you look like an asshole?
How did these famous folks pull it off? Can us mere mortals ever hope to make indoor sunglasses "a thing," and do we even want to?
Alexandra Pauly, Style Writer: There are very few people who can pull it off without looking stupid. If you aren't Anna Wintour-level, it's pretentious. Amy Schumer is definitely not at the level where she can wear sunglasses inside without looking like she's on tranquilizers.
Elaine YJ Lee, Features Editor: So you're saying sunglasses indoors equates to status?
Alexandra: It doesn't always equate to it, but I mean, it's not sunny inside. The idea is fundamentally stupid.
Elaine: I think it's interesting to understand why it's fundamentally stupid.
Alexandra: Because there's no sun inside.
Jake Silbert, News Editor: Who's an icon worthy of wearing sunglasses inside?
Caroline Brown, Branded Content Editor: Wait, Kim does it.
Jake: How do we feel about Kim?
Caroline: With sunglasses inside, it really depends on the personality you're bringing with it. If you're being nice to everyone, wear whatever you want. But if you're aloof, I'm like, "rude."
Jake: For me, it's universally asshole status.
Lauren Black, Email Marketing: For some people like H.E.R., it's specifically their look. It works for H.E.R. because she always wears small glasses that you can see her eyes through — it takes away that façade a bit, and makes them more of an accessory.
Elaine: Why would celebrities even want to wear sunglasses indoors?
Alexandra: On a practical level, for the paparazzi and cameras. But also, there's something about sunglasses that separates the wearer from the rest of the public. Y'know that phrase, "the eyes are the window to the soul?" Sunglasses inherently close that window.
Elaine: It's a defense thing.
Lauren: It's about putting a wall up.
Alexandra: You add distance, and there's an affectation that comes with that.
Lauren: I agree. Eye contact is such a personal thing. If a celeb is out and about doing their thing, maybe they're not trying to look cool. Maybe they only have sunglasses on because they want to get coffee in peace. That, I understand.
Jake: But getting coffee is different than being on the red carpet.
Elaine: So it's more about whether the sunglasses are part of the outfit or a tool of defense?
Caroline: I think it's both. Remember when Hailey Bieber was getting those chants at the Met Gala last year, and she put on shades because she was crying? Sometimes it's good that sunglasses create a barrier.
Elaine: I can support celebs wearing sunglasses because of paparazzi or as a defense thing, but what bothers me about Kim Kardashian wearing her futuristic sunglasses is that they're supposed to be tech-y and functional, but she just wears them to parties. Like, you're supposed to be wearing those for skiing.
Jake: As a glasses-wearer, if the sunglasses are prescription or even transitions, I'm okay with it.
Caroline: But do you have to wear a disclaimer that they're prescription?
Jake: That'd be ideal, actually! But are sunglasses inside okay if it looks effortless, like if you just forgot to take them off?
Elaine: I dunno. I feel like the Olsens always look effortless because they're not wearing makeup.
Lauren: They've also been owning sunglasses since they were kids. There's that one photo of them matching.
Jake: So the Olsens definitely get a pass, but what about us normal people?
Lauren: If you're a normal person, absolutely do not wear sunglasses inside.