After an eight-month delay, Certified Lover Boy has finally arrived, and in true Drake fashion –it's a goldmine for Instagram captions.
Let's face it, whether we'd like to admit it or not, we're all guilty of poaching a Drake lyric (or two) for an Instagram caption. That super introspective take on a past relationship? The not-so-lowkey materialistic flex? That weirdly specific reference to a '90s R&B album? Yeah, we can thank the 6 God for all of those.
A quick Google of "Drake lyric captions" tells you all you need to know. How many artists can say they have a dedicated caption generator? Not many. On CLB, The Boy makes it explicit that he is aware of his fans (those who claim they're not fans, too) devotion to taking his lyrics as boilerplates: "Under a picture lives some of the greatest quotes from me."
While the above might be a tad too on the nose, Certified Lover Boy has rich pickings of Instagrammable lyrics from start to finish.
Drake's album introductions are renowned for setting the tone and being statement-filled. Opening with "Champagne Poetry," he declares, "It's the pretty boys versus the petty boys." Who, exactly, the pretty boys are is up for speculation, but it wouldn't be the first time Drizzy has declared himself "the petty king," and we're sure the boys out there will be using this lyric to choose their side.
We're in the last quarter of the year now, so you can be sure the early birds are out there preparing their "New Year, New Me" captions already. "Fair Trade" and "Love All" have plenty to offer, with gems including: "And the dirt that they threw on my name turned to soil and I grew up out it," "I've been losin' friends and findin' peace but honestly that sounds like a fair trade to me," and "Loyalty is priceless and it's all I need. Can't burn a bridge just to light my way."
Remember, Certified Lovers, the most important love is the love you give yourself: "Heart is on my sleeve and my body is in the hall of fame." Although love is the name of the game, there is, of course, a vast supply of passive-aggressive energy throughout the album: "Told you I'm aimin' straight for the head, not aiming to please," "I'm like Sha'Carri, smoke 'em on and off the track," "Checked the weather and it's gettin' real oppy outside," and, "See the watch collection and assume I got time," are some of our favorites.
Your watch collection might not be as boastful as a custom Virgil Abloh Patek, or "Two point two for the Rafael Nadal," but Drake's is, and he'd like to remind you just how much he paid for the Richard Millie in question on "You Only Live Twice." A worthy caption, if you're one of the 50 people to own said watch.
Just as his intros are regarded for their tone-setting, Drake's outros are the home of extended introspective monologues. "The Remorse" stays true to form, bringing the album to a close with lyrics such as: "Pain is just a place that I go to get the bars from. Anxiety's a drug that I use to get the job done. Delusional's a space I like to think that I'm far from." Just as how every early 2000s Youtube video contained the chorus of Fort Minor's "Remember the Name," this will undoubtedly become the pretty (or petty?) boys' motto for months to come.
There is no way we could comb through this project line-by-line without drawing your attention to this gem: "Zara heels bound to give ya Zara toes." Take from that what you will.
According to Champagne Papi, Certified Lover Boy is "a combination of toxic masculinity and acceptance of truth which is inevitably heartbreaking." Whether or not that is true, is for you to decide, but maybe leave this one out of your Tinder bio.