Corporate America won't stop coming for the girlies.

In apparent celebration of International Women's Month and the 30th anniversary of Disneyland Paris, Minnie Mouse is ditching her signature red dress for a polka-dot pantsuit designed by Stella McCartney.

According to a press release, McCartney was inspired to design the sartorial shake-up because she and the cartoon rodent "share the same values."

The British designer, known for her use of recycled materials, said Minnie's illustrated outfit is made of "responsibly sourced fabrics" (sustainability, check!) and hopes the new look will make our Mickey-loving queen "a symbol of progress and empowerment for a new generation" (inclusivity, check!).

CNN reports that Disney will unveil the character's full faux-woke makeover come International Women's Day on March 8 (apparently, today's announcement of the pantsuit was just a sneak peek).

The initiative will also include a McCartney-designed T-shirt featuring Minnie alongside the phrase "Divine Feminine" (???), a design slated to debut at McCartney's Fall/Winter 2022 runway show.

Minnie's "empowering" makeover is a ridiculous grab at brownie points akin to Mars, Inc's revamp of the M&M's.

Last week, the candy giant inadvertently made itself the laughing stock of the internet by re-outfitting the green M&M — historically portrayed with dramatic makeup and white go-go boots — in flat, no-nonsense sneakers.

The reason for the de-vamp? To show the world that Mars is committed to "creating a world where everyone feels they belong and society is inclusive."

Minnie's pantsuit and Green's sensible footwear aren't in-and-of-themselves offensive, nor are they attempts to "destroy fabrics of our society" (Candace Owens's words, not mine).

What's truly ludicrous is that Disney and Mars think re-photoshopping a couple of characters somehow equals inclusivity and empowerment. The makeovers are hardly a step towards meaningful change; they're purely optics (and a profit-driven marketing ploy, considering that McCartney and Disney will sell that "Divine Feminine" Minnie Mouse shirt in March).

So tonight, pour one out for Minnie Mouse, the latest victim of corporate de-YASSification.

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