Red Dead Redemption 2 / Rockstar Games

With the past week having presented all manner of exciting events, both enriching and downright detrimental for the culture, we must take this opportunity to thank our loyal readership for berating each post with such sarcastic precision. With you, our weekly roundup wouldn’t nearly be as good as it is now.

This week was one of celebrity doppelgängers, with Tekashi 6ix9ine and Donald Glover being mistaken for other artists (tongue firmly in cheek). Sneaker savagery was rife from readers, but adidas took most of the heat. We also received an almost-fire verse from a commenter masquerading as an Aussie rapper – let us know what you thought of it in the comment section following!

Be sure to keep your funny, interesting, and bizarre comments coming, and in the meantime, check out the aforementioned stories, as well as many more below.

Please keep in mind these comments are meant to be taken as jokes and are only highlighted for the comedic effect they offer.

For 500, please, Alex.

Nike

Original Post: COMME des GARÇONS’ Nike Cortez Platform Drops Today at DSM

10. “I’ll take 2 broken ankles and busted foam after the first outing, please.” – Christian Clark (Source: Facebook)

Sunburnt Dick is Pantone Color of the Year 2019

adidas

Original Post: Here’s Where to Get Your Hands on the adidas ‘Dragon Ball Z’ x Kamanda “Majin Buu” Today

9. “Now available in colors such as sunburnt dick, and aggressive salmon.” – Antonio F Iati (Source: Facebook)

Stop right now, thank you very much.

Getty Images / Bennett Raglin

Original Post: Tekashi 6ix9ine’s Album ‘Dummy Boy’ Postponed “Until Further Notice”

8. “Fuck me, Posh Spice has let herself go.” – Sam James (Source: Facebook)

Snoop’ll teach you how to bake

Chronicle Books

Original Post: We Made Recipes From Snoop Dogg’s New Cookbook For Thanksgiving, Here’s How They Turned Out

7. “The only way I’ll learn how to cook.” – Madi Sherburn (Source: Facebook)

Mind. Blown.

Getty Images / Dimitrios Kambouris

Original Post: Watch the Trailer for Donald Glover & Rihanna’s Curious New Project

6. “He looks so much like Childish Gambino it’s crazy.” – Tim MacLeod (Source: Facebook)

Nice try mate, but they’re called prawns.

kaiit_isshe / Instagram

Original Post: 10 Australian Rappers You Need to Know

5. “Gday mate, got that shrimp on my plate, I got to work late coz a Dingo stole my car keys, Vegemite please. Can’t handle the heat, degrees – please believe, my ancestors built prisons on their knees. And so on.” – Sean Williams (Source: Facebook)

Elevating sneans

adidas

Original Post: Be the First to Cop the adidas YEEZY 500 “Salt” at StockX

4. “My dad would love mowing the lawn in these bad boys.” – Spencer Dzurovcin (Source: Facebook)

What’s your flavor, Paul? Tell me what’s your flavor.

adidas / Bonsai

Original Post: Craig David’s Louis Vuitton x adidas NMD Customs Will Make You Drool

3. “I would rather wear bin bags as shoes. If you like these you may need professional help.” – Paul Readman (Source: Facebook)

Gonna have to get your extra shot elsewhere now, guys.

Getty Images / Justin Tallis

Original Post: Starbucks to Stop Customers Watching Porn in Stores

2. “Starbucks takes Fappuccino off the menu.” – Jens Søgaard (Source: Facebook)

Chris, the people have spoken.

Red Dead Redemption 2 / Rockstar Games

Original Post: The 5 Rarest Kicks in ‘Red Dead Redemption 2’ & How to Unlock Them

1. “More cowboy content please and thank you.” – Laurie Milton-Jefferies (Source: Facebook)

Tell us what you think of the new Artemis Fowl trailer here – does it have you excited or is it ruining your childhood?.

Weekend Editor
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